Loading ...Truffle Pig’s Accuracy Doubtful
October 21st, 2003 by Habib
While snorking around on his Hunter Valley estate for truffles, it appears Phillip Adams has stumbled onto a crop of particularly powerful hallucinogenic gold-top mushrooms; this is the only logical explanation for his meandering and clearly deranged item in today’s “Australian”.
Phil is fantasising about President Wesley Clark meeting Prime Minister Simon Crean, being warmly received by a cheering crowd and launching their plans to save the world from encroaching law and order.
While most hallucinogens have some side effects with nightmare scenarios, the only thing missing from Phil’s journey into chemical travel is a cherubic Bob Brown and Kerry Nettles flitting about, scattering flower petals on the two leaders.
His enhanced perception seems to have blotted out some ugly reality, such as the throngs of unemployed throwing buckets of shit on the PM responsible for the collapse of the Australian economy, or the fact that Air Force One was shot down on the way in by a Stinger missile launced from Lakemba.
***UPDATE*** Red Horse Rainbow has the unedited text of Fatboy’s dream drivel.
Posted in General |
This guy’s sick little fantasies are bordering on the perverse.
Here’s the bit he wanted to write but didn’t:
“As Prime Minister Crean and President Clark hugged like long lost brothers (it actually turned out that they are brothers who were separated at birth by the evil machinations of the Repulican Party and the Liberal Party, and re-united by a Palestinian Imam), Mr Crean turned to the audience and stated ‘And we owe it all to this man - Comrade Secretary Adams’. With that the audience parted and broke into raucouse applause, as the man they called ‘The Wise One’ paraded past his adoring fans and up on to the stage. His powerful, well toned and battle wearied figure was an imposing one. ‘Yes it is true, I have saved the world’ said he. ‘You are now free to live out your lives without fear from law and order, to write poetry and eat tofu. All I ask in return is that you erect a statue of me so that I may be immortalized, and forget about all that religion and stuff and worship Me instead’. Amidst the thunderous applause, the three Great Leaders - Adams, Crean and Clark turned and faced the sea, the sun shone on their faces and a choir started singing Handel’s Messiah out of nowhere. Ahh yes, there are great days ahead…….
Keep your fantasies, you phat phuck, cos thats about as real as they’re gonna get
COMMENT:
A statue- do we have that much granite? If they ever build one, I want to re-incarnate as a pigeon; a bloody big pigeon; with explosive diahorrea.
Comment by BlogWannabe — October 22, 2003 @ 10:10 am