Daily Diatribe

Australian Special Forces are now targets of suicide bombers
http://au.news.yahoo.com/030331/2/rdy7.html
A statement was issued later from a representative of a moderate Islamic group, the “Fatwa Jihad Kill Them All Allah Akbar Society”, of Punchbowl: “For the dastardly and cowardly crime of preventing random missile attacks on civilians, these so-called “SAS” thugs are to be blown to smithereens by our glorious martyr brigades, praise Allah.
To compound their crimes, the unarmed civilians they have protected with their underhanded tactics of attacking military personnel in military vehicles have been JEWS!! yes, JEWS!!
By the beard of the Prophet, these outrages will be atoned for!!
Death to the infidel from down-under! How dare they adopt superior tactics to prevent the slaughter of women, children and elders!
I personally will wipe my knob on the pita bread of the next doner kebab ordered by you filthy pigs, and my cousin Habib has had a wank in the hommus!!”

****NEWS FLASH***** Due to a change in their fan base, at the end of the current tour the “Dixie Chicks” have announced a name change, and a new tour.
Their new name is the “Baghdad Bimbos”, and they are to undertake a more-or-less permanent tour of assorted Middle East shit-holes.
Spokesidiot for the band, who now wishes to be known as “Fatima” said: “let’s face it, we could play naked and they would throw hog entrails at us. We are less popular than anthrax back home, so we might as well head for the Gulf- we hear they pay top dollar for brainless flibbertigibbets over there, y’all.”

Blogger has been of the air all morning- this is a good sign for future usage with Google now running it.
Maybe the Iraqi central command should be hacked, and Blogger installed as their main operating system- we won’t need laser bombs, they will top themselves in a matter of days from sheer frustration.

Speaking of middle-eastern self defenestration, I see the population of Iraq is not forming a long orderly queue to attach explosives to their persons and dispatch some infidels, and pick up the standard fee (70 black eyed virgins etc); the Iraqis regime is having to import mobile martyr mines, mainly from Lebanon.
I know Lebanese doof music is particularly awful, but there must be some other reason to inspire assorted kebab-rollers to want to turn into instant Jackson Pollock;
maybe it IS fun to run around with an AK47, glower at commuters at check points and generally behave like the Crips and the Bloods, without the threat of jail time.
Now the Lebanon has returned to some semblance of peace, all the Hamas, Druze and assorted other gang-bangers are bored, and looking for something to blow up, even if it’s themselves; recreation tip, boys, get a Playstation, take up drinking or surf the web for porn……………………..

The Secret is Out- insider trading doesn’t exist, it’s because of time travel
http://tv.yahoo.com/news/wwn/20030319/104808600007.html?
this boy also knows where the Binster is hiding out, and other useful tips;
I don’t think he has put a lot of thought into his potential defence, unless he has his eyes on a stint in Bellview.
He may have plenty of answers, but he hasn’t been able to answer the paradox of time travel- if it exists in the future, it must exist now (unless he is the real deal, we must keep an open mind); therefore the past would be full of tourists from the future, come back to watch Nelson cop one at Trafalgar; (imagine the cue to see the French get clobbered at Dien Bien Phu) and all the other highlights throughout history.
If you were from the future, why would you bother with the market? You would have every lottery and sports result at hand, and could clean up without causing notice to the Feds.
The main question, though, is where has he parked his DeLorean?

If you feel the need to tell the commie fuckheads from “resistance” what you think of them, or just want to see where they’re planning to impede traffic and wreck other people’s property, their web address is below- there is a link for mail.
http://www.booksnotbombs.org.au/about.shtml
And I know it is illegal to transmit a virus by email, and probably also illegal to incite anyone else to do so, therefore anyone out there who had a nasty worm or klez virus whatever you do, don’t send it this rabble’s email address, thus clogging their mail server and preventing them from organising further riots over the web.(You know, the same web that’s NOT a product of globalisation and evil capitalism).
The site is worth a look, just to see how ill-informed and ignorant these “students” are- pretty good examples of the result of twenty years of public education run by a Trotskyite collective of troglodyte trolls……………….

Latest release from Newsmax:-
“1. French Government Officially Boycotting NewsMax
It’s official - the government of France is boycotting NewsMax.com.
This week, NewsMax Pundit Charles Smith called the French embassy in Washington and spoke with Deputy Press Counsel Agnes Vondermuhal.
Ms. Vondermuhal bluntly stated that the embassy had passed details of NewsMax’s “Boycott France” campaign, including our recent ad in the New York Times, on to officials in Paris.
Apparently, the Chirac government was angered, and expressed their concern about the NewsMax boycott with a simple statement:
“We are boycotting NewsMax.”
Ms. Vondermuhal said the embassy had taken strong exception to a recent NewsMax advertisement in the New York Times and stated that the information presented by NewsMax was incorrect. She noted that the French had voted for U.N. resolution 1441 on Iraq and that France was supporting the U.S. war against Saddam.
Ms. Vondermuhal also asserted that the NewsMax campaign against France bordered on racism, saying that her mother was Jewish and faced similar insults during the Vichy years in France.
Racism? (Too bad the French government has done little about anti-Semitic violence carried out by appeasement activists in Paris this past week, a report NewsMax carried.)
NewsMax has pointed out that France as a sovereign nation has acted to oppose the effort of the U.S., Britain and dozens of others nations who sought to disarm Iraq peacefully.
We also pointed out that France has moved from understandable dissent with America to aggressive collaboration with Iraq - including leading a worldwide coalition to oppose the United States. France, for example, has threatened other European nations it would block European Union membership if they supported the U.S.
There is also growing evidence that France assisted Iraq in recent years with military and technology transfers in violation of existing UN resolutions.
What is also clear is that the government of France is very threatened by NewsMax’s effort.
NewsMax has taken the lead in the Boycott France campaign, having placed newspapers ads in the Washington Times and New York Times, as well as having flooded the Internet with more than 20 million messages encouraging the boycott and providing a list of French owned companies to boycott.
Many American media have been fearful of pushing the envelope with a French boycott, as NewsMax has. Why? French owned companies buy huge amounts of advertising on American media channels.
NewsMax, however, will not sell out. We stand for America and American values, and that’s why we oppose the French for their vile efforts to undermine America and back Iraq.
2. France: We Do So Want the Allies to Beat Our Pal Saddam
Speaking of those unpredictable Gauls, they’re in a tizzy over their own failure just days ago to pick sides in the war against their genocidal business and military ally, Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein.
As reported by NewsMax and other media, French Foreign Minister Dominique de Villepin, answering questions Wednesday after a speech at London’s International Institute for Strategic Studies, refused to answer one query: “Who do you want to win the war?”
His silence spoke volumes.
Now, however, the French insist they want the 50-plus-nation coalition led by the U.S. and Britain to win.
The Foreign Ministry, in what the Associated Press called “an extraordinary statement,” said it was “indignant” at suggestions that French support for the United States was ambiguous.
“I will remind you that the minister said on March 24 … ‘The United States, we hope, will win this war quickly,’” ministry spokesman Francois Rivasseau fumed on Friday.
Oh, please. The French flip-flop so much they ought to start manufacturing sandals.
By the way, AP’s report on the latest snit by the French notes NewsMax’s boycott: “The French are particularly troubled about calls in the United States for a boycott of French products. A U.S.-based Internet site this week published an advertisement in The New York Times urging consumers not to fly Air France, eat Yoplait yogurt or buy other French goods.”
Our ad in the New York Times has garnered worldwide attention… and our phones have been flooded with calls from international media, including some French outlets.
3. Top Secret: How Iraq Faxes the UN
We have a secret to share with you we bet the CIA doesn’t even know.
Iraq has managed to re-open communications between its UN mission in NYC and what’s left of its foreign ministry in Baghdad.
The foreign ministry complex is one of those Iraqi government buildings damaged by coalition bombing.
But as NewsMax has reported time and again, the U.S. has not successfully cut off Baghdad from the rest of Iraq and the world - allowing Saddam’s forces to actively communicate with its network.
Without providing details, Iraq’s UN ambassador Mohammed Aldouri told NewsMax’s Stew Stogel he is in contact with Foreign Minister Naji Sabri through the facilities of a “third country” whose identity he declined to reveal.
Sabri has recently shown up in Damascus, Syria on his way to and from a recent Arab summit in Cairo.
On Friday, Aldouri, who has often complained about “communications problems” at the Iraqi UN mission and at the ambassadorial residence, has now found a way to receive orders from Iraq.
Stogel reports that Iraq is now using a public fax machine in the delegates’ lounge at UN headquarters.
For example, a letter from Sabri to the Security Council president was literally received in full view of reporters and diplomats.
In the letter, Sabri informed the Security Council president that Baghdad would not accept the council’s newly approved and revised oil-for-food program. According to Aldouri, Baghdad considers the new Council resolution illegal and any oil sales as “stealing from the Iraqi people.”
When quizzed about this “unusual” way of communicating with his superiors, Aldouri simply smiled and walked off to the Security Council president’s office.
One reporter quipped that the Iraqis can always fall back on the facilities of Kinko’s just one block away from the UN. Another option would be to use the services of the French embassy, which charges more for the faxes, but serves better croissants.
4. Media Ignore Congressman’s Snipe at U.S. Troops
Most underreported story of the week: the remarks by Rep. Charlie Rangel (D-NY) against our servicemen and women in Iraq. The media establishment is covering up for him.
“I just don’t believe that you bomb women and children in order to enforce [the U.N. resolution on Iraq],” the Harlem leftist said on Fox News Channel’s “Hannity & Colmes” Thursday night.
When challenged on his claim that U.S. forces were killing Iraqi children, Rangel said sarcastically: “You’re right. They’re shooting themselves. They just don’t know they’re being liberated.”
Gee, kind of like those “baby killer” accusations lodged against Vietnam vets by hateful 1960s activists.
Check out NewsMax.com’s Inside Cover for a follow-up on exactly how many other media are reporting Rangel’s sickening comments. The answer will appall you.
5. GOP Vows to Stop Helping Hillary
The odd couple of House Majority Leader Tom DeLay and Sen. Hillary Clinton at an event last month to promote children won’t be repeated, U.S. News reveals. How come? Because the Republicans finally figured out that Hillary was using them in her scheme to appear more moderate than she is, all in preparation for her presidential run.
“All we’re doing is helping to soften her lefty image,” a top leadership aide told the magazine. “She needs us to get moderates if she runs [for president] in 2008.”
Conservatives plan to finally start fighting Mrs. Clinton, U.S. News says.

I just lifted this from Sgt. Stryker- what a hoot:
“Fox News had its own response to the demonstrators. The news ticker rimming Fox’s headquarters on Sixth Avenue wasn’t carrying war updates as the protest began. Instead, it poked fun at the demonstrators, chiding them.

“War protester auditions here today … thanks for coming!” read one message. “Who won your right to show up here today?” another questioned. “Protesters or soldiers?”

Said a third: “How do you keep a war protester in suspense? Ignore them.”

Still another read: “Attention protesters: the Michael Moore Fan Club meets Thursday at a phone booth at Sixth Avenue and 50th Street” - a reference to the film maker who denounced the war while accepting an Oscar on Sunday night for his documentary “Bowling for Columbine.”
Of course media critics are jumping all over themselves to slam FOX for this. But I don’t care, it was just too funny an opportunity to pass up.”

I sat through “Shamans of the Amazon” (SBS 2030 28/03) for the ensuing laughs, and they came in droves.
Stupid bloody hippies stomping around the Amazon jungle to achieve “enlightenment” by drinking a brew of vines and leaves, and vomiting.
Funnily enough, you can do the same here by drinking “beer”.
The kaleidoscope images used to illustrate the effect of ayahuasca (main ingredient DMT) I loved- they look just like what I see driving my bed through the sky when really pissed;
There was yards of film dedicated to justifying the episode as a “religious experience” and “opening doors of perception” blah blah blah- we’ve heard it all before from Aldous Huxley.
In my youth, I went through a dopey hippy phase, where all enlightenment was to be gained chemically, and had a lot of fun, but enlightenment achievement nil.
These fucking pillocks think they can get a handle on reality by escaping it; do they really think poor slobs in the Amazon load up on this shit to get a greater insight on the world?
Maybe they do so because their life is so bloody awful.
This idea of drinking for social lubrication is bollocks- I drink to get drunk.
A recent series on the ABC showed the diet of Tudor England, and illustrated the fact that people (including the King) were constantly pissed.
This hippy dross that using chemicals for getting loaded is for the advancement of humanity, or to gain a deep insight, or whatever else they claim from the experience, is bullshit.
Humans, like most of the rest of life-forms on this planet slurp up chemicals to get loaded, nothing else.
If you have some fun on the way, jolly good.
(By the way, the credits at the end of this program revealed it was made with the assistance of the Australian Film Commission- I hope you are happy that your tax paid for some hippy deadshit to get off his face. If he had any concept of hypocrisy, he would have funded it out of tie-dyed T-shirt sales in Byron Bay.)
And by the way- if you want to slag him off, the web adress is http://www.shamansoftheamazon.com
(P.J. O’Rourke did a write-up on ayahuasca in “All The Trouble In The World” and found it a bit of fun, but quite nauseating).

From our correspondent in Dubai:
CNN/Reuters: News reports have filtered out early this morning that US forces have swooped on an Iraqi Primary School and detained 6th Grade teacher Mohammed Al-Hazar. Sources indicate that, when arrested, Al-Hazar was in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square and a calculator.
US President George W Bush argued that this was clear and overwhelming evidence that Iraq indeed possessed weapons of maths instruction.

Latest pice for the Libertarian site:-
“I have been slugging around this morning, scanning the papers and doing the usual shit you do on a Saturday morning when you don?t have to work, with a re-mastered Beach Boys CD playing, and I had a bit of an epiphany:
What has been the big difference between us (being the USA, the UK and Australia) and the assorted enemies we have faced in wars over the last few years?
Attitude- and that is reflected in the music and the radio broadcasts during those times.
Probably the nastiest conflict the US and Australia has been involved in during the last forty years was Vietnam, and what were people in the West listening to?
Songs about girls, hot-rods and generally having fun, not stirring tunes about killing the enemy; meanwhile, Radio Hanoi wasn?t exactly fun central.
Even during World War 2, Benny Goodman and co got more airplay than anything else, and there weren?t even that many anti-German songs around (except for the odd one by Spike Jones and the City Slickers, and they were Jews, for chrissake).
Meanwhile from Berlin, you got Lord Haw-Haw and Wagner- lots of fun there.
The big difference is that we don?t hate the enemy- we just have to get rid of the idiots who have taken over running things, and who have made these places no-fun zones.
No doubt Radio Baghdad is running regular broadcasts exhorting the populace to rise up and slaughter the infidel, accompanied by hideous Iraqi marching tunes.
That is why they won?t win, and their ilk never has- people don?t really like authoritarian regimes and the accompanying lack of fun- they would rather watch bad soap operas, worse movies and listen to harmless music, and get on with having harmless and relatively pointless fun.
We don?t live long enough as it is to waste time marching around and listening to turgid speeches by ageing dictators, not while the surf?s up????”